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Post by bfizzle on Jan 11, 2010 0:12:09 GMT -5
Word? I'll be sure and try that. Or maybe I should save them. We're obviously going to be spending a lot of time at sea with our mail order husband. Should we ever encounter a Jaws situation, I'm sure not one buckeye, but a jar full of them will teach him a thing or two.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 11, 2010 0:16:12 GMT -5
I wonder if we could use them to poison him as well and keep the boats for ourselves. It'll be like Natalie Wood, except way less attractive.
You could also sell them on ebay. Come football season there will be demand for them.
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 11, 2010 0:19:55 GMT -5
I think I'll hold on to them. You know, just in case all our dreams come true.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 11, 2010 0:22:03 GMT -5
Probably a good idea. Tossing buckeyes into the shark's open mouth will be both easier and way more fun than a harpoon gun, but we should get one of those too.
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 11, 2010 0:23:58 GMT -5
Right, we'll need something to seize and render our husband's penis useless.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 11, 2010 0:26:02 GMT -5
Yeah, that's why we'll need it and not to shoot at other boats.
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 11, 2010 0:27:10 GMT -5
We'll use his credit card to buy cannon's behind his back for that.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 11, 2010 0:31:34 GMT -5
He looks like he'll have plenty of hams for us to use as ammo. He'll be the best paid for husband ever.
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 11, 2010 0:34:21 GMT -5
We'll totally get our money's worth. We can even stow that buff killer clown away in the cabin until we've castrated and thrown our husband overboard. I mean, someone will have to wait on us hand and foot.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 12, 2010 1:32:02 GMT -5
If we get a buff clown we have to get a buff little person too. It's the right thing to do.
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 12, 2010 2:06:15 GMT -5
True. He'll need a friend.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 12, 2010 2:31:27 GMT -5
Plus, if we collect them all we can toss them in a tiny car together.
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 12, 2010 2:34:57 GMT -5
We'll have to set up a circus tent for them out back. As fun as this sounds, I can't trust them to be in the house while I sleep.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 12, 2010 2:36:36 GMT -5
You should never trust anyone under 5' they always go for the shins. We should so get a bearded lady and judging by the way bbsy's dressed in that picture he's a pretty good candidate.
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 12, 2010 2:41:33 GMT -5
Should we just invest all of our dead mail order husband's money into starting a traveling circus? We can also hire a mermaid and a man who walks on stilts. We can even wear matching ring leader outfits.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 12, 2010 2:44:36 GMT -5
A traveling circus would be great. We could get the sword swallower to double in the porn enterprise you're going to start. Speaking of matching outfits. I believe I've found us in a few years.  |
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 12, 2010 2:48:57 GMT -5
Holler! This is quite a five year plan we have on our hands.
I'm so digging that picture right now. So fitting that its from People of Walmart. You know that's where we'll ultimately end up. Haunting the aisles, telling anyone who will listen about our glory days when we were rich and famous. I can't wait.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 12, 2010 2:50:24 GMT -5
I'd even be willing to skip the rich and famous part if it means we get to wear matching gold spandex pants sooner.
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 12, 2010 2:52:56 GMT -5
But then we wont have any stories to tell the lowly Walmart shoppers. Unless we just make them up as we go. We do have the charisma for it....
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 12, 2010 2:54:55 GMT -5
We can pretend to know their parents. Then tell them stories about how their parents were involved in the circus orgy.
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 12, 2010 2:57:47 GMT -5
I like it! We can hint at actually being their real parents. I'm beginning to like this Walmart idea. We can even host a recreational game show where contestants race to grab certain items from the store. The one who finds all their items in the shortest amount of time gets to give us a lap dance.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 12, 2010 2:59:59 GMT -5
That's brilliant. It automatically counts out the fatties and elderly.
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 12, 2010 3:02:29 GMT -5
We're so brilliant. We totally have to run for office once we're eligible.
By the way, its so nice to finally put a face to the name. Has anyone ever told you that you look just like Bruce Wayne? The resemblance is uncanny.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 12, 2010 3:10:33 GMT -5
We're going to rock the debates. Plus, the circus freaks are going to be so helpful in making the other candidates look bad.
All the time. It's so weird. I think it's the chin.
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 12, 2010 3:12:42 GMT -5
I'm sure they'll make very lovely, creative signs. And boy, will they give a new meaning to the term mud slinging.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 12, 2010 3:20:54 GMT -5
I'm most looking forward to training one of those cute little monkeys to take off our opponent's toupee.
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 12, 2010 3:25:28 GMT -5
I'm so excited for our press tour. How do you think Bill O'Reilly will take to us? If things go south, our freaks can start singing the National Anthem while we have an impromptu mud wrestling match. I think that will get our point across nicely.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jan 12, 2010 6:45:38 GMT -5
We could challenge Rush Limbaugh to a match and tape it when he tries to grope you. Then we get him fired and ostracized from his homophobic buddies.
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 13, 2010 2:39:09 GMT -5
Lets do this shiz, MC!
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Post by bfizzle on Jan 13, 2010 2:39:40 GMT -5
We could challenge Rush Limbaugh to a match and tape it when he tries to grope you. Then we get him fired and ostracized from his homophobic buddies. Who is Rush Limbaugh? Is he hot? |
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