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Post by canedust on May 20, 2008 1:15:49 GMT -5
1. Don't get high on your own supply.
2. When somebody asks if you're a God, say yes.
3. Fanty's prettier.
4. Alien motherships fleets have no firewall or virus protection.
5. Raptors won't kill you if you steal their eggs, then return them.
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Post by b_Pooly on May 20, 2008 10:00:38 GMT -5
Note about 5, IF you have a fancy flute that makes similar noises to what they make.
6. Said flute would never say, "eat us, we are hungry" or just random garbage.
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Post by canedust on May 21, 2008 2:21:35 GMT -5
7. Cheetahs are keen stoners.
8. They have excellent balloons on Jupiter.
9. If the war never happens, Connor never sends back Reece, which means the war is never prevented. Even if Jim Cameron wraps it all up, Skynet will send a threequel back in time.
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Post by b_Pooly on May 21, 2008 10:10:25 GMT -5
10. Let the Wookie win
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Post by canedust on May 22, 2008 1:48:53 GMT -5
11. Alien bounty hunters have stupid voices
12. When Roy Scheider says "close the beach", close the goddamn beach.
13. Evil crab-monsters love the 28th storey stair-well.
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Post by spiderguy524 on Jul 3, 2008 17:46:43 GMT -5
14. All phone numbers start with 555
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Post by canedust on Jul 4, 2008 2:12:58 GMT -5
15. Never ask The Hulk if "that's all you've got?"
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Post by b_Pooly on Jul 4, 2008 9:09:29 GMT -5
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Post by Captain Smiley on Jul 4, 2008 10:23:14 GMT -5
16. It's ok to sell headless budiregars to blind children.
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Post by b_Pooly on Jul 4, 2008 10:31:24 GMT -5
Was that a dumb and dumber reference? LOL! If it was here's more:
17. It is not ok to hide the fact you have two pairs of gloves from your friend when you go to Colorado.
18. Austrians don't want to put another shrimp on the barbie.
19. Elderly women will steal your groceries.
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Post by Captain Smiley on Jul 4, 2008 11:07:36 GMT -5
Yes that was a dumb and dumber reference and there is still a few we have missed.
20. It's not safe to lick the chair lift at the aspin ski range.
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Post by canedust on Jul 4, 2008 11:23:35 GMT -5
21. You'll shoot your eye out.
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Post by b_Pooly on Jul 4, 2008 11:26:21 GMT -5
Ok, I forgot what you guys call parakeets, so I wasn't sure.
22. Having a motor bike is way better than having a van that is made up to look like a dog.
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jul 4, 2008 13:43:13 GMT -5
23. It's not absurd to be terrified of baby dolls, they're lethal.
24. Tap dancing will not save you from being thrown to the lions.
25. When being pursued by a killer, the more clothes you keep on, the likelier it is that you will survive.
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Post by b_Pooly on Jul 4, 2008 15:14:29 GMT -5
25. When being pursued by a killer, the more clothes you keep on, the likelier it is that you will survive. I was thinking of saying that, lol! 26. It is not stupid to have sex in a motel when a killer robot is trying to kill you, it is highly romantic. 27. It is incredibly stupid for a shape-shifting robot to revert to it's original form after it's tartget notices something strange about her boyfriend coming out of the back seat of a car with two dead cops in the front. However, it is not stupid for a killer robot to assault an entire police station alerting it's sleeping target of it's presance and giving said target a distraction so they can leave the presinct. 28. The security guard doubles as the voice for the green giant that is not so jolly and is being sought after by the military. 29. He means you won't like him when he's hungry is not what he meant. 30. Freddy always had a thing for the whores of that house. 31. Sandman killed Uncle ben. 32. If you find yourself stuck in the old west don't piss off people called "Mad Dog." |
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Post by canedust on Jul 4, 2008 18:58:50 GMT -5
Tap-dancing?
T-1 was programmed to kill her no matter what, so he didn't bother with stealth tactics.
33. Pigs need help to fill up a silo of crap.
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Post by b_Pooly on Jul 4, 2008 19:50:28 GMT -5
Tap-dancing? T-1 was programmed to kill her no matter what, so he didn't bother with stealth tactics. 33. Pigs need help to fill up a silo of crap. Tap dancing? What? He wasn't programmed for stealth, yet he snook into the apartments and he waited to walk up on her to shoot her in the club. What will you say next? 2 +2=5? 34. Don't ever watch Chicken run on an empty stomach, especially in the theather. 35. Mel Gibson is a cock. |
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Post by DRAVEN on Jul 4, 2008 20:30:24 GMT -5
36. If out driving late at night, and Neil Patrick Harris is hitchhiking...do not pick him up.
37. If you did not learn lesson number 36, then at the very least do not leave him alone in your car with the keys...he has been "trippin on balls" and will steal it.
38. Michael Jackson, Sylvester Stallone, and your third grade teacher...aliens, all of them.
39. If driving along and you see a flying cow, there will be a flying truck dropped in your path very shortly.
40. Above all else...never, ever, get your frank and beans stuck in your zipper.
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Post by b_Pooly on Jul 4, 2008 20:49:56 GMT -5
41. Weed makes cheetas run faster and have more endurance.
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Post by canedust on Jul 4, 2008 23:25:48 GMT -5
Walking through a crowded club with a gun. Pretty sure that's not subtle. Number 29, what?
42. Just apologize to your tower, it'll forgive you.
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Post by DRAVEN on Jul 5, 2008 1:37:13 GMT -5
43. Never talk about Fight Club.
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Post by b_Pooly on Jul 5, 2008 1:45:36 GMT -5
Walking through a crowded club with a gun. Pretty sure that's not subtle. Number 29, what? 42. Just apologize to your tower, it'll forgive you. he was hiding it in his coat. He had to pull it out right in front of her remeber? surely you didn't forget the deer in the headlights look she gave him? |
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Post by Mutant Crouch on Jul 5, 2008 2:15:44 GMT -5
Gregory Hines in History of the World part 1. I can't remember if it was before or after he tried to pass himself off as Jewish. 44. John Cusack is like a magnet for rain. 45. If you're an attractive female, it doesn't matter what's going on around you, your hair and make-up will remain perfect and any dirt smudges will be attractively done. 46. The creepy guy isn't the killer, he's really just trying to help. 47. It's just as easy to fight in heels as it is flats. 48. Despite the rotting flesh, zombies don't emit a strong odor. 49. Product placement in movies is acceptable as long as the fourth wall is broken and then it's clever. |
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Post by DRAVEN on Jul 5, 2008 5:01:42 GMT -5
guess i HAD to be the one to bring this up
50. Everyone's preference for coffee is black, and no one EVER pours a full cup...just enough for dramatic effect.
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Post by bigfaker on Jul 5, 2008 5:24:21 GMT -5
51. He's not a puppet, he's a real boy!
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Post by canedust on Jul 5, 2008 5:44:02 GMT -5
52. No matter how much they cry, no matter how much they beg, never, never feed them after midnight.
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Post by DRAVEN on Jul 5, 2008 6:29:32 GMT -5
52. No matter how much they cry, no matter how much they beg, never, never feed them after midnight. 52a...addendum...don't get them wet either. |
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Post by canedust on Jul 5, 2008 7:50:46 GMT -5
53. There ain't no coming back. There ain't no coming back!
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Post by b_Pooly on Jul 5, 2008 8:46:40 GMT -5
53. There ain't no coming back. There ain't no coming back! 54. Unless you have a Dalorean. |
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Post by canedust on Jul 5, 2008 10:26:59 GMT -5
No, it was a 72 Thunderbird.
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